I Went From Selling Lemonade to Running Guns, and Now I'm Here

In The Curse of Monkey Island--arguably one of the best games of the '90s--pirate Guybrush Threepwood encounters ten-year-old entrepreneur Kenny Falmouth at work behind a lemonade stand. "Is the lemonade good?" the pirate asks.

"Oh gosh, yes!" Kenny replies. "It's a dandy tonic for scurvy. It'll cure all your symptoms, including, but not limited to: gradual weakening, aching muscles, sunken eyes, painful gums, ashen skin, loss of teeth, internal bleeding, the reopening of old wounds, diarrhea, kidney failure, fainting, halitosis, and death. ... [And] it has a refreshing citrus flavor with no unpleasant aftertaste."

Image copyright LucasArts Entertainment Company LLC

Not much later Guybrush meets Kenny again, but the boy has made significant changes to his lemonade stand. "I've got a new business now and gosh, is it swell!" he says.

"What is it?" asks Guybrush.

"I'm running guns!"

Image copyright LucasArts Entertainment Company LLC

Well, that happened fast. But it is pirate times; ten-year-olds sold explosive weapons to everyone back then, and without proper background checks, too. It was actually the lemonade that raised eyebrows.

The point is, Kenny's journey is a lot like mine.

Well, just a little like mine.

Vaguely like mine.

Basically, we only have one thing in common: I've jumped from blog to blog almost the way Kenny does from dangerous business venture to dangerous business venture. I've done the author blog, the daddy blog, the Mormon blog, the inspirational blog, the Lego blog, and even the dream journal blog (which was actually going great until I finally kicked the habit of sleeping). All of them started out okay, but they each met the same terrible fate:

Burnout.

My problem was I kept specifying myself into a corner. You'd think it'd be easy for an aspiring novelist to have a lot to say on just one subject, but it gets hard when you're focused only on bite-sized spiritual messages or writing advice and trying not to sound like a pretentious hack.

So, enough with the niche; out with the conventional blogging wisdom! I'm gonna do the whatever blog. If I want to write about writing or church or family, I'll do it. And if I want to write about neckties or Thomas the freaking Tank Engine, you'd better believe nothing's gonna stop me.

Except pizza. I will stop for pizza.

Welcome to my blog. Here's a picture of a lemon holding a shotgun. Because this is the Internet, dang it.

Image source: www.dreamstime.com